Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Bonita Fay's Fussing Forum

That's what I think I'll change the name of my blog to. Seems I only have things to fuss about these days.

I will say I've have some fun days with the kids and grandkids lately, but without pictures (since my camera seems to be forever on loan, lol) it's just not the same blogging about it. Hopefully this weekend I'll get my camera back.

Seems to be family issues with an in-law. Nothing that is said or done can make this woman happy. She is miserable and she wants everyone else to be the same. She thinks she should be the center of attention, even at the grandbabies birthdays. Ooops, just let the cat out of the bad didn't I. No I'm not talking about me, although I do love my share of attention. Okay, I'll let all the cats out of the bag.

My wonderful daughter in law Diana, I believe was adopted. There is no way she could have been born of the woman I am speaking about. I can't even begin to describe how awful this woman is to her children, her parents, the people at church, everyone. And nothing is ever her fault, NOTHING!! It's always someone elses. The stress she puts poor Diana through is horrible. She has a FIT everytime we do anything with the kids. She says they don't spend any time with them. We live over an hour away and we usually see the kids once every 2 weeks. Sometimes in our neck of the woods, sometimes in theirs, but mostly in the middle. Diana's mother lives 5 minutes, yes 5 MINUTES from Diana and the kids. But she's always too busy when they want to do anything with her.

And then she always wants to pick fights with her kids in Church. Can you believe that? Picking a fight with your kids IN CHURCH. And when the kids tell her that Church is not the place to fight or have heated discussions, she gets all mad and walks out. She even had a fight with her other son in law right outside the Church doors, using profanity. It's truly ridiculous.

So to keep the peace and to try to make life easier for Diana, Wade and the kids, Hut and I have decided to forego any family events. That includes holidays and birthday parties. It's just not worth the stress of dealing with her. I have informed my daughter in law of our decision and I'm sure she is not happy with me. But someone needs to try to keep the peace and if Hut and I being at the family functions is going to cause this woman to go off the deep end, then I am willing, for the sake of my family, their sanity and peace of mind, to walk away. We will just have to have 2 celebrations or something to make up for it.

And this is coming at a time when my ex-husband is getting ready to be released from jail and we have issues with his girlfriend. She always tries to stir up trouble too. But I have extended the Olive Branch to them so that we can try to wipe the slate clean (even after all he has put my boys through). I just want to have a stress free time with my kids and grandkids. I'm praying I can do this with my ex and I am also praying that Diana's mother will see how hurtful her ways are to everyone and hopefully get some help for her issues. Pray that this woman finds peace in her life soon.

Thank you all for once again letting me fuss and air my dirty laundry. It's just because I know you will all have some great advice and words of wisdom.


Missy's Blog said...

Bonnie, if having two celebrations will keep the peace then I say ... go for it. I just don't get miserable people ... I've known people like this before. They can't be happy if others aren't. Maybe she will have an epiphany and get over herself. Love you! And I love the new name of your blog. Tee Hee!

PEA said...

It's just such a shame that you and Hut have to forgo the family celebrations just because of one miserable woman. You'll be losing out and she'll be winning:-( I know that sometimes it's not worth the trouble but it's so unfair, isn't it. You haven't done anything wrong and yet you're the one who has to suffer in silence. Believe me, I know what that's like...think "daughter in law" here for me! lol It's amazing that Diana's "mother" hasn't been told off long ago. She'll die a lonely old miserable woman if she doesn't change her ways. Ahhh...if only we could choose our in laws:-) xoxo

Bonnie said...

Pea, I did think about your daughter in law. My daughter in law called me and said if she had to choose between us and her mother, she would choose us. My son went to talk to his MIL tonight. Not sure what happened there. Biggest thing is, this woman claims to be a Christian. Hopefully things will work out. The kids don't want us to miss out on anything. I was just trying to save them some grief.

Granny Annie said...

Everyone is trying to fix Diana's problem but Diana. She needs to try to make the peace with her own mother and draw a line in the sand. If Mom wants to spend time with Wade and Diana then Diana (a full grown adult) needs to express her rules and expect her mother to follow them. Maybe Diana needs to make that choice she mentioned and see if here mother doesn't come around after a few years of be left out in the cold. If the mom is mentally ill then there is nothing anyone can do unless she gets professional help. You and Hut especially don't need to be in this mix because you have enough problems of your own right now. All easy for me to say huh? LOL I just think someone needs to protect you guys from the mess.